It happened again. They did something irresponsible. Rude. Lazy.
They were wrong. You are right.
You can feel it. We’ve all felt it. The anger. The tension in the chest. The laser-like focus. The words you’re going to say running through your mind. The list of how they’re wrong.
What feels good is to step into our justified, righteous actions. To blame. Vent. Expect an apology. Or at least some groveling.
You might be right to expect them to make it right. And they might actually follow through.
But if they don’t, consider whether it’s worth giving all of that power and control of your day to the very person you believe is wrong.
We can get stuck in the bad behavior of others. But what does that really do? What good does that create?
Instead, consider the alternative.
Rather than what’s deserved and what’s owed, what if you asked a different set of questions?
Questions like ‘what would great look like?’
‘Here’s what I need. What will it take?’
Even better yet, ‘what’s their perspective?’ ‘What led them to write/say that?’ ‘What if they’re right? Or what part of what they said is right?’
To let an email ruin your day is normal, but it’s not leadership.
When these moments happen – and, unfortunately, we all know they will – we can get even, or we can get better. Which option makes us stronger leaders a year from now? Which one puts our organization in a better place tomorrow?
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